i must be emo...................

seratus selipan puluh, empat tidur tidur - 184 sleeps!!!

OMG I am up at like 4.30 am to watch the socceroos with Jappy*yawns*. this has been a sucky week. Tabba is really high maintenance this week. Found out she has a new BF who is 18 and has a car. *nah*. Oh well thats the least of the probs, the teenage angst and hissyfits this week have been particularly trying.

"OMG my life is soooo woe.....I must be emo"

On the good news front Montessori are taking Jappy for a trial next week - so fingers crossed -I can't wait to get him out of this sucky public school he is at. His bitchteacher gave him dention BUT didn't let him eat his lunch (he at it a 3.25pm when he finished). I really detest these almost retired older women teachers who want to label children to medicate them into some stepford child compliance in order to make their jobs easier. The only thing she is teaching him is learned helplessness and it breaks my heart.

footballers wives

tooo stressed to eat..I should be happy with this Isn't this what every girl wants???


Just trying to get all my study done. Brain is sooooooooooooooo full. Safi still sick, Jappy and Tabba both fighting like cats and dogs. Kids are so going to an orphanage I swear!

Exam is tomorrow 9-11.30 supposed to meet Hoda afterwards for movie but I think I may pike come home go for a run or go to the massage thingy instead or even come home and just sleeeeeeeeeeep so exhausted - emotionally - kinda physically..I think I need a bex and a good lie down.

hold on...life is okay...just saw a promo for footballer wives series 5 commences July 19 on UKTV *yipeeeeeeeeeeee*

how ironic my exam is on motivation and emotion - with a big section on sleep deprivation!

Footballers Wives...

tooo stressed to eat..I should be happy with this Isn't this what every girl wants???


Just trying to get all my study done. Brain is sooooooooooooooo full. Safi still sick, Jappy and Tabba both fighting like cats and dogs. Kids are so going to an orphanage I swear!

Exam is tomorrow 9-11.30 supposed to meet Hoda afterwards for movie but I think I may pike come home go for a run or go to the massage thingy instead or even come home and just sleeeeeeeeeeep so exhausted - emotionally - kinda physically..I think I need a bex and a good lie down.

hold on...life is okay...just saw a promo for footballer wives series 5 commences July 19 on UKTV *yipeeeeeeeeeeee*

how ironic my exam is on motivation and emotion - with a big section on sleep deprivation!

stats exam :0(

seratus delipan puluh, delipan tidurtidur....

well my sucky stats exam was on today and for the first time I have no idea how I went...usually after an exam I can sort of guage my mark - but this time no idea. The test was hard and after a night of no sleep (Safibubba was sick), the uni then stuffed our room up, so I am going to lodge a complaint. Got Saffibubba from babysitters early and took her to the doctors....just a virus and monitor it...but last time she was this sick she ended up in hospital for 3 days getting dehydrated. anyways back to the study - got M&E Exam on Wednesday. Good news Montessori are gunna let Jappy do a trial..

:0)
brain hurts gotta sleep. been too stressed from study to run. But did a 30min yoga video and felt heaps betterer.

sick of study

screams....my brain is full already. its friday night - 3 more sleeps till my exam for stats and I am not studying tonight as my brain is full and it hurts.

so I am sitting back blogging with my friend E&T (evans and tate red blend). Jappy is really sick with a fever and headcold. I hope the other 2 dont get it. Looking forward to seeing Waynes play and having some post theatre cocktails at Kuletos tomorrow night. I really feel the need to have a big night.

I am at the 1.5 point with uni and it feels really good and really overwhelming at the same time BUT I know I can do this. I know I can be a psychologist and be a Dr with a PHD.

:0) just gotta get past f*Cking Stats first!

I can do this.

always have wagga

seratus sembilan puluh tidur-tidur, 190 sleeps till I go to Bali :0)

Okay my brothers eyesight can possibly be fixed so this is awesome awesome news. Gunna spring a visit to Melb hopefully next month if I am not too busy (already have a work trip to NZ, plus Jappy has a school trial for a week at Montessori). Perhaps I can go down during the week and I will just work out of our Melb Office.

Jappy is sick at the moment with RBPG...(runnybumpukeyguts) and the poor little bugger has a terrible fever :0(. Hope he gets better soon as I think tomorrows soccer match might be out for him. Still Studying furious and I think I have nearly mastered the bloody confidence interval stuff. though its fully doing my head in!!



Going to Waynes play tomorrow night and can thoroughly recommend it for anyone in Sydney. We'll always have Wagga - written by Wayne Tunks an awesome upcoming director/writor actor.

http://www.newtowntheatre.com.au/whats_on/wagga.php

high maintenance Wednesday

I work in HR so my days can be pretty emotional and high maintenance and my boss is like Denny Crane from Boston Legal - but today was pretty tops.
1) talked one manager out of an unwritten warning that was not exactly ethical - more of a personality conflict between manager and the other person. Mgr pouted and dobbed on me to MD, but MD supported me.
2) one of my favourite line managers came to me upset cause one of the team members had called in sick because she was having a 2nd trimester miscarriage and he wanted to know the right way to handle it and organise flowers etc...(what a sweetheart and how he could be really empathetic to the situation. Wish manager 1 could be more like him.
3)Sales staff and egos....say no more.
4) counselling session with one employee whos partner has dumped them for another party.
5) counselling sesison with another whose partner had gone off to find themselves...

and this was on my early day too...

then I get home and my beautiful brother who has MS - has been classified as legally blind (he can see a little peripheral stuff) and he is just terrified of being completely blind. The good news is he can claim a disability pension thingy temporarily (yipee my taxes go to good). He is seeing another eye specialist to see if something can be done surgically tomorrow, but he sooooo scared and I feel so useless not being able to fix it...YES - news flash - I do not control the universe....

then I get an email from my 20 yo (yes still a baby) nephew who is in the army and he is going to Iraq next month...he hasn't ever been outside Aust and he is off to Iraq. Time to ramp up my antiwar protests again and restart the letter writing campaign (now its personal it does mean more). He is very pragmatic about it and I am sure he views it as a career move, but i feel so grown up and worried for him, so I must ring my exsisterinlaw (his mum) and give her my love big time. The good news is he has emailed his dad (my eldest non MS brother - from whom both him and his sister have been estranged from for the last 10 years or so - long story short ? By brother was/is an emotional retard and never invested the time / effort into his kids after the marriage breakup)

So that is kinda pleasing...yes it was all highmaintenance and possibly sucky, but I feel really good. I managed to get a run in and clean the house and eat a healthy dinner. I contributed well today and I feel good - if not a little concerned, but still positive..:0)

700 grams

seratus sembilan puluh dua tidur tidur....

Today was checkin day and I have gained 700 grams. *nah* I didn't get exercising last week as much as I wanted cause of the rain and I probably had too many alcohol calories (but I did work them into my calorie load). A bit down about this fact. I know I will just have to work harder, but it is annoying me. My fabulously (&skinny) neighbour was lamenting she must go on a diet cause she has put on 4 kg in the last year and has never been fat in her life before (she is about an 8-10). I know its just perspective and that there was nothing malicious in it, but it made the amount I have to lose almost tooo overwhelming to contemplate. BUT I am not allowing it to be an excuse for a binge or some big fall off the wagon. I really want to be 80kg or under by XMAS and I can do it. I have the support, I have the will power.

I just have to try harder!

Hypnosis

Seratus sembilan puluh - tiga - tidur-tidur....(193 sleeps)Slept like crap last night! Listened to the Paul McKenna thingy I downloaded for my ipod last night, but I did it just before bed so I think that wasn't such a good idea as it made me super alert! Maybe I should download his think yourself sleepy one as well. Its a Tuesday feeling like a Monday today cause of the public holiday. 6 days till my sucky stats exam. I am feeling slightly more confident though. But still have a lot of work to do. Also worried about Gordie (brother that I like as opposed to my other brother that I tolerate), as his eyesight has not improved and in fact has gotten so worse he can not read print and he is has computer text up to the largest size. Bloody MS its such a sucky disease. With no preparation - everything just hits fast. I am terrified he will go completely blind - and I am sure he is even more terrified and I feel really helpless that I can't fix it. DAMN...I do not control the universe...I hate it when I am reminded of that fact. Will attempt to get thru the day without too many DennyCrane moments.:0) Have a tops Monday oops Tuesday....I

pvalues and christians

seratus sembilan puluh, empat tidur tidur! (194)

Went walking today and gave in and took the dog. He is such a little bugger he literally peed on every single tree! and then when I was running he would change direction and run into my feet, I only just managed to avoid a major clums. Its 10am and I am still not awake..thank god for public holidays.DH is taking the kids to see Cars today at the movies so I can have some quiet study time today.


PM....DH dicked around the house all day and the kids were running amok..got some study in which was good.

Put the slow cooker on (the only good thing about winter) and all day a nice soup has been brewing...My kids call it ChickenGutsSoup!! Its kinda like my mum used to make.

Because she died so suddenly (back in 95 - she was only 59 and I was 25 at the time) I didn't ever get the chance to ask her to write down all those family favourite foods. But over the years I think I have perfected the chickengutsoup.

350 g of chicken breast cubed (2cm size)
350 g of chicken gizzards
200g of finely chopped chicken livers
5 cups of chopped vegies (celery, onion, carrot, swede, parsnip)
water
chicken or vegie stock
1/2-1 cup of pearl barley.
Can also chuck some chicken necks in it too.
Fresh parsley to taste
1-2 cloves of grated garlic.

It all sounds disgusting (hence the name) BUT I can assure you - it tastes great in winter and even better any time of the year when you are sick.

Oh the sun did shine in sydney today *s* AND I actually dried stuff on the clothesline...Tabba did her first shift at work tonight at the closer kFC. I am happy she is working but I am worried cause it has a drive thru it maybe more prone to a holdup. I hope the put them through really good security safety training.

Oh and another thing..how many calories does sex burn? Marc (who owns Golds Gym in sydney) told me a 30 min session of sex was better for you than a 1 hour walk. but the calorie burning thingy I found on msn - put it down as something really low. Also sometimes sex is vigourous and sometimes you kinda play the lazy game (or selfish game) so I just wonder exactly how many calories it is. Perhaps wearing a HRM during sex wouldn't be a turnoff? I wonder how I can explain that one to DH??? Too scared to post it on the forums, way tooo many serious types sometimes and a couple of Christians. (nothing wrong with Christians - my Inlaws run a christian school in FNQ and my bestest friend at work is a big fan of hillsong - but it freaked me out when one person wrote of 'woman being given to man by god' therefore was required to do all the housework - type arguement -)

This is where I am with the evolutionists...cause I wasnt genetically engineered to do housework!!!! Seriously....woman was given to man? And we (western society) slag off islam for being a sexist religion.

Speaking of the WEST I am surprised to see a pro palestinian story coming out of Gaza. The Israelis had bombed the beach in Gaza killing picnicing families. There was this horrible footage of a little girl - aged about 10 screaming and throwing herself on the sand beside her dead father - her entire family was killed - the president of palestine has promised to look after this girl. For years western media only showed stories of the bad evil hamas and palestinians who blew themselves and innocent israelis up. Many in the west still don't know that Arial Sharon was instrumental in the murder of many innocent refugees in the 1980s. I really hope the west wakes up and realises that there is good and bad on both sides and that the insanity of this (and many other) war is just DUMB.


Anyhow back to the revision of my sucky stats......*screams* What a nightmare subject. I think after I get a pass for it...(seriously I don't care if I only get a pass) I am going to reward myself with something...hmmm I think I need a new oroton purse, the one I am using is kinda scratched and stretched...or maybe I should get the tinting on my Mazda3? Tinting I think cause it will make my car cooler (literally cause its black) and I will look cooler (figuratively speaking) driving it!


wow what a rant!

psychopowers......

seratus, sembilan puluh, enam tidur-tidur...

raining in sydney :0( again.but got out this morning for a walk and went and purchased a banana - $1.25 each, but gee it tasted good....DH is in a bastard mood at the moment. So unhappy within himself and therefore tries to drag the rest of us down. He is also seeming to be jealous of my 'new' lifestyle. He gets cranky if I go for a walk when he can offer me a much better workout. Hey I am up for sex as the next person, but my walking does stuff for my mind and body and I am in a routine that I do not want to get out. He is also sabotaging - last night he went out to get ciggarettes(which I soooooooooooooo don't approve of, but dont get me started) AND brought me back a cornetto...

supportive ? hmmmmm then this morning he chucked a man hissy that I don't understand him and I don't listen - then the second I respond its 'don't use your psychology powers on me" Like I am some wierd crusading lycraclad superhero type deploying my psych mind games for control and conquering type activities...*nah!*

I doubt if I will ever understand him sometimes. he doesn't talk about his feelings and the stuff going on in his head, and I am supposed to guess and know ?

maybe I should study to become a clairvoyant? I wonder if they have trouble understanding their DH?

DH = dear hubby, or dick head? hmmmmmmmmm

flatfriday

seratus, sembilan puluh, tujuh, tidur-tidur....197 sleeps till Bali...

feeling flat today.

feeling flat cause its rained all week and I haven't been able to go walking in my lunchhour at work.
feeling flat because one of our managers is complete softc*%K and was gutless today when he should have been strong.
feeling flat today cause I am cranky at myself for feeling flat... *nah*